i just look at this little blinking cursor and feel like its asking me to squish a million emotions and a million reactions into a few words. and i just cant do it. blink. blink. its like trying to put Niagra Falls into a kitchen faucet. i guess if being lost and being confused about what to do and where to go and how to feel and who too feel that about, and being cut off from just about every warm familiarity that ever deigned to grace my sky with its brightness could all be summed up in a word it would be this, and so sadly this- alone.