what's good advice if you dont take it? probably the answer to your problems. the more problems you caused by not listening to it.. now, those need good advice.. and then you just keep snowballing all the way down to the bottom of the hill, and it's lonely down there.

i get a lot of good advice about a lot of things, but for some reason, i have a hard time swallowing it. or maybe it's my pride that i have a hard time swallowing.. Either way, i get a lump in my throat.

i am so tired and mixed up and rambling right now. what's hitting this 'page' is whatever blasts into my head..my empty and open head.

i cut it open because i couldnt keep things in. i couldnt hide anything in there... so many escapee's from those never-barred windows of my eyes. running loose on things like this and a stack of worn 1 subject notebooks. i slit open my skull with a sharpened pencil.. i keep cramming stuff in there, and things are spilling out in the left-over graphite from the cut onto pages of my newest notebook. and in scrawly charachters and an attemot at telling a story, i bleed this old mind dry. maybe if i had taken someone's advice 3 years ago, i wouldnt be doing this either.